Saturday, May 17, 2008

Yippee-Ka-Yay, Muthah Fuckah… Hasta Mañana, Baby…


In around thirty six hours, my life is going to change like never before. The person the wifey and I have waited for far too long is going to finally see the light of day and catch her first breath…

Margaret Jasmine Aguarin Golangco is about to be born. And I am scared shitless.

There are several reasons I have become this cowboy, this maverick that people have come to know me to be. For one, I’ve been through enough in life that has helped me learn enough to wade through most types of quagmires life might throw at me. Then there’s the rather comfortable safety net my family’s business accords me, which gives me a level of confidence (some would say cockiness) to charge head on to practically anything. I do so armed with the knowledge that I will come out on the other end possibly not unscathed, but definitely alive, kicking and probably even laughing my ass off.

Then there’s the huge factor of a handful of great friends who have stuck with me through the thick, the thin and everything else in between. There’s this overwhelming sense of calm and security with the knowledge that no matter what kind of sleazebag I may reasonably turn into, there will always be people who will lend me an ear and give me a hand.

It also helps that I married a very strong lady, who thrives on her own, and can practically survive everything short of World War Three. In short, she doesn’t need me to survive. Thus, I can go on playing cowboy without having to worry about her.

I didn’t have anyone to truly worry about, I wasn’t going to be alone anytime soon, and damn I felt invincible.

With Marge, I can’t help but feel that’s all about to change.

This cowboy is getting mighty antsy. But a happy antsy. Assuming I do end up getting off my high-horse, taking off my spurs, and watching the sunset while going home a little earlier than usual for the rest of my life… there’s no better reason to do so.

She’s coming into an old world, a tired and dirty world that almost always seems to be running short of breath lately. It’s a world that seems to get slightly darker at every dawn filled with false half-promises. Like every parent, I carry hopes that this little bundle of giggles and unspeaking eloquence help try to bring a little light back into this earth.

For now, I raise my glass and toast the cowboy, the maverick…

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